


Blindsighted

by GenderQueerGremlin



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Chat Noir being a Good Friend TM, Cheesy, Healthy dose of angst, Ladybug accidentally breaking Chat Noir's heart for the bajillionth time, Ladybug vaguing Luka because secret identities, Marinette accepting her actions have CONSEQUENCES
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-11
Updated: 2020-05-13
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:27:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,982
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24132082
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GenderQueerGremlin/pseuds/GenderQueerGremlin
Summary: When Adrien and Kagami start dating, Marinette comes clean about her feelings, knowing full well she'll be turned down, but deciding she needs to in order to move on.Chat Noir is there to listen when Ladybug needs to talk some things through.
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir & Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug, Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Kagami Tsurugi (implied), Luka Couffaine/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug (pre)
Comments: 21
Kudos: 39





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> For someone who hates love triangles or shapes of any number of sides, I sure did write this anyway. 
> 
> The T is for a gentle smattering of swearing.
> 
> Hope you enjoy :')

“The guy I’m in love with has a girlfriend.” 

Chat Noir blinks in surprise, before Ladybug’s words fully hit him. “Oh. Oh!” He places a hand gently on her shoulder. “That’s… I’m sorry, Ladybug. I know that hurts.” 

She shakes her head quickly. “It’s okay. It sucks for me but. I'm trying this cool new thing, where I just try to be there for him. As a friend. 'Cause I realized after I felt like I'd 'lost' him that he was never mine to lose, because he's not a thing. He's a person who just wanted friends, and I really... let him down a lot on that front. So now I just want to be happy for him and be there for him. Even if it kinda hurts right now." She chuckles wetly. "A fucking lot." 

"Ladybug..." 

"Hey Chat?" 

"Yes?" 

"Do you think people can be in love with two people at the same time?" He could swear his heart fell straight out of his chest, eyes widening comically as he stared at his lady with lips parted in shock. "Or at least, like, care about two people a lot?" she added hastily after catching his expression. 

"I... Yes, I think so," he replied finally, tongue tied and mouth full of cotton, heart proving it hadn't fallen out by hammering against his ribs. "Why... do you ask?" It's so fucking stupid to be hopeful, but here he is, like always. 

Where he fears he might always be. 

Ladybug sighs and swings her feet absentmindedly as she stares ahead. "There's this guy... different guy," she says with a wistful quirk of her lips. "I always felt kinda drawn to him, I guess. And... I know he likes me. But it wasn't the same feeling as with the other guy, so I just... didn't give it much thought." She trails off for a moment, and he can tell she's thinking through something. 

He feels like he's going to pass out. He cannot be breathing normally, how can she not notice? Nevermind, he doesn't want her to. Play it off, play it cool, you've got this Chat Noir.

"Recently, real life's been... hard. It's- I don't know. I've made a lot of mistakes and I've hurt people, being caught up with this guy. Uh, the first one, not- Anyway. But this other guy, he's been there a lot for me recently. Always, really, if I think about it. I can always be myself around him, because that's the me he sees, which sounds cheesy, but it means a lot to me. It's exhausting feeling like I have to be someone I'm not to make other people happy. And maybe I don't, maybe that's something I told myself and no one's really expecting it from me, but it _feels_ like that sometimes. But never with him. I've always just been... me. And for whatever reason, despite all of the dumb things I've done, he still likes that person."

His body feels like a live wire, or maybe a spring. Coiled up tight, tense, ready to launch himself into the fucking sun. Don't be stupid don't be hopeful-  
but holy shit it sounds like-  
_don't be stupid don't be hopeful_

Whether she takes his silence as a go-ahead or feels like she needs to fill the quiet, Ladybug continues, gazing up at the sky now, at the vast expanse of blue. 

"It'd be really selfish to pretend I'm over the first guy. Guy A? Anyway, I'm not, and I'm trying not to be the person who's willing to hurt people to get what I want anymore. Because that felt awful, and this is someone I never ever want to hurt." She winces inwardly. "Not again, I mean. 

"And I want to tell him that. Be honest and tell him I like him but I'm not ready and I don't know when I will be. I just don't know how he'll take it, and I'm... scared." 

It's clear as she trails off that she's finished her thought, and Chat Noir feels like he's going to vibrate out of his skin. ( _Don't be stupid don't be hopeful **don'tbestupiddon'tbehopeful ******_ ** **)****

********

********

"Sometimes, even when we mean the best, people get hurt. Feelings are... difficult to navigate. But Ladybug, I think as long as you're honest with him, as long as you're being true to yourself, if he cares about you, and I think he probably does, because you're kind and strong and caring and amazing, my lady, then I think he'll understand. I think he'll just be happy to know you like him at all. Everything else... you can figure out together." 

Ladybug is looking at him with soft, bright eyes, and she bites the corner of her lip, fighting a smile. He wants to see it in full, wonders for the millionth, billionth time how her face looks lit up with a smile without her mask. 

"Thanks kitty," she says softly. She takes a deep breath and stretches her arms over her head before standing and offering him a hand to pull him up. "For listening, and for being here for me. You're the best partner I could've asked for." 

She wraps her arms tightly around him in a rare, brief hug. He returns it without hesitation, but as much as he revels in the affection, he can't help the off feeling creeping up his spine. Sixth sense warning him of something ill to come. 

"Anytime, my lady," he says with a softer version of his normal cocky grin as she pulls away. There's a growing sense that the moment between them is ending, and he doesn't know why or how to stop it. 

Her earrings' beeping is what finally breaks the spell. 

"Time to go, I guess. Thanks again, Chat Noir. I think you're right. I'm going to tell him how I feel. I think he deserves to know." 

Him. 

_Him._

But not _**him.**_

She turns to leave but pauses, yoyo in hand. "I'm glad you've found someone, by the way. You deserve to be loved." With that and one last parting smile, she disappeared over a dozen Parisian rooftops, leaving Chat Noir alone, feet rooted to the spot. 

And his heart crumbles straight to ash, leaving a bitter, awful taste on his tongue as rejection old and new washes over him. 

don'tbehopefuldon'tbestupiddon'tbestupidstupidstupidstupidi'msofuckingstupid

He has more friends than he's ever had in his life (the first friends he's ever had in his life), a girlfriend he loves (at least, he thinks), and a partner he can trust with his life and who trusts him with hers (but not even her name). 

He has never felt so crushingly, utterly alone, unseen, and small.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If it's any consolation, in this universe, Marinette/Adrien are still end game. Might expand on this at some point, but in the meantime, this is complete as is. 
> 
> Lemme know if you want to read a continuation? 
> 
> And of course, thanks for reading!


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really didn't expect y'all to vibe with this so much, but I loved all of your comments, and a few of you wanted more, so here ya go! 
> 
> There's some healing and some spiraling, but the good news is that this won't be the end.

After a week or two of moping, Marinette cleans her room. It is weird and painful, but necessary. The pictures of Adrien adoring her walls _need_ to go. 

It makes her feel a little sick to think she kept them up for so long. To realize he accepted her explanation of "I'm a fan!" without so much as blinking. To understand, just a little, the depths to which he's been... objectified. By people like her. 

She takes a deep, steadying breath. She was - okay, is - a teen with a crush. Who happened to be both classmate and celebrity. It was a weird spot for him to occupy for her. Mistakes were made, but she's trying. Maybe too late to get what she wants, but that isn't the point of it. 

Doing better is the point. 

The pictures and memorabilia don't go in the bin. Instead, she places them in an embarrassingly not-so-small box for safekeeping. Partly, she's not sure her bruised heart could take the symbolism of throwing her affections away that literally. Partly, it's to remember the promise she's made herself. 

She never wants to do anything again that physically or metaphorically belongs in that box. 

Marinette tucks the box away where it is both out of sight and, hopefully, out of mind, and sets about her second task: redecorating. 

Pictures of things that inspire her go up where Adrien's face once lived: her friends, her family, pictures of album covers, fashion inspiration, beautiful natural scenery, her own creations she's especially proud of. If one single picture of Adrien sneaks its way in there, well, it's a group photo, and he _is_ her friend. Now, she wants to be his. 

All in all, the process isn't a particularly long one, but it's the most draining thing she's done in a while. But like a good workout or the feeling of completing a new project, it's satisfying, and, as she hoped, refreshing. She might even go so far as to say healing. 

"I'm proud of you, Marinette," Tikki says softly, placing a comforting hand on her cheek. She smiles and pats the Kwami gently on her head. 

"Thanks, Tikki."

She spends the rest of her night with her parents, helping in the kitchen and kicking her dad's ass at video games while her mom watches, smiling at the sight. 

This... might not be everything she wanted, but she considers it might be what she needed. She's beginning to be okay with that. 

\---

"Adrien?" 

"Yes, Kagami?" 

"If it's alright with you, could we take a picture together? I would like to use it as the background on my phone." 

He's a little surprised at first by the request, but he smiles and obliges. It's such a simple thing, but as with everything Kagami does, it's carefully considered. She asks respectfully, allows him the room to say no, lays out her reasoning. There is structure in the surprise, and if that doesn't describe his girlfriend, he's not sure what does. 

They use his phone to take it ("Your camera is a better quality than mine."), and warmth spreads through him at the gentle smile Kagami wears as she looks at it, that he's pretty sure she doesn't realize she's showing. 

And then it drops off her face as her brows furrow ever so slightly. "Oh. I think I clicked something." She returns his phone to him, and indeed, she's accidentally hit the back button and brought up his gallery. 

The warmth disappears and he feels a chill run down his spine as he sees red and black in almost every other picture in his gallery. He's praying Kagami didn't notice. 

"Why do you have so many pictures of Ladybug, if you don't mind my asking?" 

Goddamn it. 

_Because I'm in love with her. Was in love with her?_ seems like a wholeheartedly terrible answer (even if it's the truthful one). 

"Because I, uh, was helping Alya out with her Ladybug blog! The Ladyblog. It's, uh, pretty popular." The lie makes his skin crawl. It was meant to prevent him from hurting Kagami, but it makes him feel awful. 

"I see. That's nice of you for helping her," Kagami replies. "Would you send me the picture of us?" 

He hates how easily she accepts the lie, even if she has no reason not to. 

"Of course!" He sends it quickly and they continue their date as if nothing were amiss. Adrien feels off for the rest of the day. 

That night, with a heavy heart and shaky hands, he finally presses his thumb down on the screen, on top of the delete icon in his photo app. Red and black polka dots disappear from his gallery and he's left with surprisingly few pictures. It makes their absence feel even worse. 

When he does finally manage to sleep, it's restless. His dreams bring him back to a conversation he had with Ladybug over a week ago. Yes, he thinks it's possible to care for two people at once. 

He also thinks she might've had the right idea, waiting for old feelings to fade before blazing ahead to embrace new ones. 

It is hard to will himself out of bed in the morning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks again for reading! I'll try my best through covid stress to post again soon.


End file.
